Yup, I have caught the Fact bug. Day before yesterday saw the God of Sehwagology doing what he does best – hammering the cricket ball as if it insulted his mother, made a pass at his wife and pissed on his Hero Honda for good measure. Great deeds inspire even mere mortals. It inspired me to tweet on about the glory of the Lord. Since the commandments of Sehwagology are fixed as of now, I present you some Sehwag facts, fresh off Twitter:
Sehwag Fact No. 1 – Sehwag does not hit the ball. The ball is so terrified of him that it runs to the boundary by itself.
Sehwag Fact No. 2 – Sehwag does not move his feet while batting because if he starts moving them, it will not remain a fair fight.
Sehwag Fact No. 3 – Once Sehwag hit a ball out of the ground. The next day, scientists claimed they discovered a new planet.
Sehwag Fact No.4 – The ICC is thinking of a reverse Bodyline law. After seeing a Sehwag drive almost decapitate the bowler.
Sehwag Fact No. 5 – When Sehwag is batting, even Ravi Shastri stops sprouting cliches. (This is true)
Sehwag Fact No.6 -When Sehwag and Tendulkar bat together, volcanoes explode in Jupiter (this one is inspired by Chacha Chaudhary. I admit it. Do not sue me.)
Sehwag Fact No. 7 – Shoaib Akhtar once tried to sledge Sehwag. Look where he is now.
Sehwag Fact No.8 – When Sehwag bats, one tends to forget who is bating at the other end. Even if it is Tendulkar. Sorry Sachin.
Sehwag Fact No. 10 – Sehwag makes Gayle look like Mark Richardson and Gilchrist look like Chris Tavare
Sehwag Fact- There are so many Sehwag facts that I have lost count.
When Sehwag goes silent, prepare to watch something awesome – Old Jungle Saying
Mr. Paul Harris bowled 10 wides day before yesterday. World record. This is what Sehwag does to you. Fear the wrath of the Lord.
When Sehwag bats, bowlers put on diapers. Do not want to get embarrassed in front of the world.
When Sehwag did that ad with the hockey stick, hockey players around the world wet their pants just thinking what if….